


No Time Like The Present

by Bizarra



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Coda Day 2020, Episode: s03e15 Coda, F/M, Light Angst, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:46:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22468105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bizarra/pseuds/Bizarra
Summary: A Coda missing scene that takes place that night after Kathryn leaves Sickbay.
Relationships: Chakotay/Kathryn Janeway
Comments: 16
Kudos: 108





	No Time Like The Present

**Author's Note:**

> This just kind of happened. Happy Coda Day 2020. 
> 
> For my gals in the Corner. <3

Her quarters were dark; the only light was from the stars and the few candles she’d lit. Kathryn had come back from sickbay and promptly taken a well-needed bath and slipped into the warmth of pajamas. She forwent her usual satin gown and settled for sweatpants, a loose tank top, and an oversized shirt of Chakotay’s that she’d filched for warmth while on New Earth. It wasn’t so much the warmth she needed it for now, as the comfort; his lingering scent was still on the fabric. She’d needed to feel him close, and she wasn’t too proud to admit it. But she knew it couldn’t be him personally. The shirt would have to do. 

Kathryn walked to the replicator and began to order her usual, but mid-sentence changed her mind. “Chamomile tea, hot,” she ordered instead. After the day she’d had, coffee was the last thing she needed. Her head still ached, and she had enough energy eddying through her body, the caffeine wouldn’t help. Once her drink materialized, she moved to the couch and curled into the corner. She tucked her bare feet into the space between the cushions and wrapped her hands around her knees. With a heavy sigh, she drank and watched the stars move past.

As she finished the hot beverage and set it aside, she thought. When had she realized the entity hadn’t been her father? In truth, it wasn’t until after she’d had the first flash of the Doctor, Chakotay, and Tuvok. The sound of relief in Chakotay’s voice. His voice. His feelings. It was then she realized that what she was seeing wasn’t real. The Chakotay that had just left the mess hall hadn’t been that... emotional. Looking back, he’d been downright nonchalant about her dying.

How had she missed that? She’d seen how distraught he had been on the planet as she watched him relentlessly try to revive her. She closed her eyes as a tear slipped down her cheek. That had been the real Chakotay. The entity had let her see the real death, so she’d believe the false death. She quickly wiped away the wetness on her cheek.

She remembered unsuccessfully trying to console her dear friend as he held her unresponsive body and cried into her hair, telling her over and over not to die. She knew then with utter certainty, that had been a man crying over losing the woman that he loved. Kathryn couldn’t stop the tears if she’d wanted to. She dropped her head to her knees and cried. For Chakotay. For her. For the circumstances that wouldn’t allow them to be what they desperately wanted to be.

After an unknown amount of time, Kathryn stilled; her tears spent. She stood, stretched her legs and took a deep breath. She recycled the cold empty cup and as she watched the metal disintegrate the thought crossed through her mind and stilled her. _I died today._  
What would have happened had the entity not taken up residence just then? Would she have truly died? Had he kept her brain active long enough for the Doctor to save her?

She had died abruptly, suddenly. Without warning. She had seen what that had done to Chakotay. Suddenly, Kathryn had a burning need to see him. To hold him. To be held. They could do nothing more, but she needed that connection to life. To living and being alive.

She needed to feel alive.

Without regard to time or what she was wearing, Kathryn left her quarters and made the short walk next door. She rang his chime before overthinking her way out of it. The door slid open, and she stepped into his quarters. They were just as dark as hers had been.

Chakotay stood in the center of the room, outlined by the viewport. As the doors closed behind her, he wordlessly lifted his arms as if he knew exactly why she was there. She closed the distance between them and fell into his embrace.

How long they stood, tightly wrapped around each other and sobbing, neither of them knew. As their crying subsided, Chakotay wordlessly bent to pick her up. He carried her into his bedroom and gently laid her onto his bed. He slipped in beside her and pulled her into his arms. They fell asleep cocooned within each other's bodies, taking the succor that only the other could provide.

She was alone when she woke the next morning. On his pillow was a handwritten note. _Help yourself to coffee and whatever breakfast you’d like on my rations. I’ll be on the bridge. Relax today. That’s an order._ Kathryn chuckled and lay back down. She buried her nose into the pillows breathing him in. How she desperately wanted to never leave his bed. To wake with him every day. With one last drawing breath, she turned and sat. Then thought; what if she could? What if they could?

She slipped from under the warm covers and helped herself to coffee and toast. Her stomach was still feeling a bit out of sorts, so she didn’t dare try anything heavier. As she ate, she wandered his quarters, touching, familiarizing; learning. He was everywhere in this room. In the blankets covering the chairs, in the sand paintings on the wall.

She stepped closer to one, her eyes widening in recognition. He’d been working on this one while they’d been on New Earth. He had completed it at some point. She smiled as she noted the subject. It depicted the yard in front of their little shelter. Her garden with the sprouting tomatoes. A figure that could only have been her toiling away in the dirt. Her monkey friend on a branch in the tree to her left.

She missed their simple life on that now distant planet; missed how free they could be with each other. With a start Kathryn realized that she was thinking about their time fondly. Without regret. Without guilt. She loved him. That comforting thought settled into her being as if it had always been there. She’d loved him before New Earth. She had loved him on New Earth, and she loved him still.

They would be all right.

With her inner turmoil at rest, Kathryn recycled her breakfast dishes and returned to her quarters to dress. 

—

He found her two hours later in the Ready Room looking over reports and trying to keep busy. She still needed time to adjust to the fact that she had died, and that an entity had mimicked her father to feed on her soul. But the one thing she was certain of were her feelings for Chakotay, and his feelings for her.

She would no longer deny them. Life was too short and as Chakotay was so fond of saying, there was no time like the present. She lay the rose he’d given her on the table; she would collect it later. Right now, she would revel in life and be in love with her best friend.


End file.
